Investigations

 3 June 2026 - CGH. Left breast ultrasound. CT scan of upper body. Stopped Metformin for the day. Keong brought mum. Asked mum to drink more water to flush away the contrast dye from her body after the scan.

4 June 2026 - 

AM - CGH. Axillary lymph nodes biopsy. Aspirin stopped for 5 days prior. Nee brought mum.

PM - NCC. Seen Veronique Tan. Me and GT brought mum. She gave mum the go ahead to go cruise. To stop aspirin until she returned from cruise.

5-7 June 2026 - Mum went on dream cruise with Chuan family, Nee and Adelia. 

8 June 2026 - CGH. Bone scan. Nee brought mum. Morning 8.45am injection, 11.30am went back for scan. In Between, mum had to drink lots of water and urinate often.

11 June 2026 - NCC. 2nd consult with Veronique Tan. Bone scan was ok, no spread to bones. But cancer has spread to axillary lymph nodes. The plan was to go for mastectomy surgery without reconstruction, and axillary lymph nodes clearance. It is only after operation can we know how many lymph nodes are affected and how widespread the cancer in the lymph nodes are, in order to establish the staging. Doc suggested it is either stage 2 or 3. Operation date 3 July 2026.

Days following...

28 May 2026 - the four of us bring mum to JB. Chuan drove. It was supposed to be Keong's 50th birthday celebration, mum wanted to treat him to eat digging. Can see that mum was happy that her four children are close-knit.

29 May 2026 - Mum's biopsy results released. CGH. Dr Mok Chi Wei. He said it was cancer. Breast cancer. The staging was not known yet. More investigations to be done before we can finalise the staging and treatment. Some blood tests were done. Me, Nee and Adrian were there. Mum maintained a strong front. 

30 May 2026 - Nee drove Mum to my house. I cooked pumpkin, chicken for her. Then I drove her to visit ah ma at St Luke's in Punggol. I took a photo of her with ah ma. Next, I fetched her to 'bath the Buddha" at Fu Hui Temple at Punggol road, cos' Vesak Day was the next day. The attendant taught us the correct way to bath the Buddha is "over the shoulder", not quite over the head. He also commented that mum has a good daughter to bring her to temple. Mum proudly told him that “我有四个孩子，个个都很孝顺”. I almost wanted to tear. Then we went into the main hall to 礼佛。As I bowed my head down to the Buddha, I prayed for His protection for mum. I couldn't control my emotions and I think my eyes were already red then. I drove mum home. Along the way, she said “父母只是陪孩子半辈子，兄弟姐妹才是陪一辈子”. This was the breaking point. I cried silently until I couldn't breathe. I think she sensed it and kept distracting me, saying the car plate number in front is blah blah blah.... Mum was much stronger than me. Ashamed.

29 May 2026

29 May is a hateful day. On this day in 2019, I had a car accident with a pedestrian. On this day in 2026, my mum was diagnosed with cancer.

母亲的癌症

 5月18日（一）

母亲晚上8点多打来。“Hello” 我也回应"Hello", 然后她又“Hello”，我再“Hello”。。。

就这样来来徐徐，互相“Hello”了几次，就挂断了。彼此以为对方的电话坏了。

我回电，她稍微紧张的说她乳房奶头流血了。。而且已是几天的事了！现在才跟我说是因为冲凉时流血似乎更多！

18 May 2026 (Mon)

Mum called. It was after 8pm. Mum seldom call cos' she always thought I'd be busy and never call.. I'm the one who always call her. It was a rare occassion that she called. Something's wrong. We exchanged a few "Hellos" and she hang up, thinking that something's wrong with the phone. So I returned her call.

She told me in a rather anxious tone that her right nipple bleeds. It has been a few days. I told her I'd bring her to a doctor tomorrow. I intended to bring her to my female GP (Dr Cheryl Lin at Greenwich) but she won't be available until a few days later. So I decided to bring her to A&E tomorrow.

19 May 2026 (Tue)

Mum was seen by a female doctor at A&E. A physical examination by the doctor caught a lump on the right breast. She referred mum to a breast specialist at Sengkang Hospital or Changi General Hospital, whichever is faster. I called CGH, they happened to have an appointment for mum the next day.

20 May 2026 (Wed)

At CGH. Mum did a mammogram and an ultrasound for her right breast. The report was immediate on the day itself. Then we saw Dr Mok Chi Wei. He told us there were 3 areas of concern. An irregular 1.9cm (diameter) mass on the right breast, 8cm from the nipple at 9 o'clock position. An intraductal nodule under the nipple that causes the bleeding, and two enlarged right axillary lymph nodes. The irregular mass is highly suspicious of malignancy.  A biopsy was done on the spot during the consultation. I waited outside. This day marked the start of all emotional roller coasters.

AI 智能时代

 2026 年。AI智能时代。
在家。偶尔去探望妈妈，有空时去看看婆婆。

萱在国外，23岁了，独立了，但缺信心，缺正能量，总怕孤独终老。唉！
恺在当兵，20岁了，明年退伍后要上大学。曾经自信狂妄，如今收敛许多。
哎，两姐弟性格截然不同。

我。在家。发发呆。睡睡觉。煮煮饭。就这样一天一天地过。
离职18年了，要找份工都难。
要教画画的，却不愿牺牲夜晚与周末，根本不可能。

母亲邀我与弟妹同游，我说“走不开”。
谁信呢？孩子都二十岁了，怎会走不开？

母亲说，当年我结婚时，家婆在床上放了一对莲藕，寓意夫妻寸步不离。
如今的我，果真寸步不离丈夫。

其实，我的“走不开”是因为——丈夫每日辛苦挣钱，我怎好意思独自快活？
若我是一个独立挣钱的女人，丈夫不顾家、不负担，我当然可以毫无顾虑地去玩。
哎。没人懂。

有人在吗？

你们还在吗？

已经有几年没有写博客了。亲爱的读者们，你们还在吗？哈哈哈。。。好像我有很多读者似的。

时隔多年，我还建在。

这些年我就忙着家务事，有空就为大众画画素描赚点儿外快，最近还疯起了 K 歌，在 全民Party 应用程序里 狂录歌 狂唱歌，也不管自己走音的杀鸡声害了多少只耳朵！爱唱就唱，快活自在。。。重新找回了少女时期那个爱唱歌的我！

以上这张卡通美照就是我在 全民 Party 里的照片啦。如果你也是 全民Party 用户及爱好者，在那里看到我的话，请多多关照哦！谢谢支持！😂😆

西施

近日看见朋友在facebook 里放上自己的古装照，我也索性玩了一番。看看我的古装像如何。。。还是最喜欢西施的装扮。